As predicted, Apple released another hyperbole-strewn video to promote their latest iPhone today: the 4S. It's not the iPhone 5, like some were expecting it to be called, because it doesn't seem to have a radically new design. It does, however, introduce some fascinating new features to what those hypnotized by PR might call 'the iPhone experience'. 

First, though, it's worth noting the improvements to the phone's hardware. A new dual-core interior processor will ensure the phone runs much faster than ever before. So that top-of-the-line screen resolution will look just as good and be twice as responsive, even under the strain of 3D gaming or image-heavy web browsing. Hard to argue with that. The camera also seems to have received an upgrade or two. I remember when 8 megapixels were a lot to pack into a full-sized, autonomous camera, and now they're loaded right into the back of the iPhone. The lens has also been redesigned, although the details on that are somewhat glossed over. I'm sure it'll do nicely for your Instagram shots of Brooklyn loft parties, though.

The iPhone 4S will come preloaded with iOS 5, which introduces Siri, possibly the creepiest feature in mobile technology to date. Remember those ironic HAL ads Apple ran back in the days of yore? They seem prophetic now. Siri is a tool that's being marketed as a personal AI assistant built into your phone. It talks to you. In that eerie, flat voice simulator tone that we associate with Stephen Hawking and OK Computer. It listens to you, too. You can instruct it to perform a variety of tasks on your phone, including setting reminders, creating calendar events, and sending text messages. It's a new, hands-free way of interacting with iOS.

Except there's a reason that voice dialing never really took off like manufacturers thought it might; it's kind of awkward and never works as well as we hope. Even assuming voice recognition technology has evolved to the point where it functions properly, I have a hard time envisioning people speaking to their phones in public. Texting is popular because it's discreet; people aren't going to dictate texts because that's the equivalent of making a phone call. Maybe the feature would be convenient while driving or otherwise physically occupied, but on the whole I can't imagine Siri really taking off as the next big smartphone feature. We tried voice command about a decade ago and it never worked.

Is Apple grasping at straws at this point? Do they need to conjure up new and possibly superfluous features to keep their buzz rolling? They do face the unique and desirable problem of finding ways to improve upon a product that tops its market, but I'm not sure Siri is putting them in the right direction. It is kind of funny that smartphones (which took a device you talked into and made it touch-operable) have come full circle in their usability, though.